Never Think You Can’t

In 2010 while pregnant with our first child I told my husband that I was interested in getting a prenatal massage. I researched prenatal massages and became familiar with the modifications that needed to be made. When I phoned the spa to book my appointment the woman assured me that they had a masseuse that was skilled in providing massages for pregnant women, her name was Denise.

When I arrived at the spa I was greeted by a friendly receptionist and directed to the locker room and waiting area. I went early purposely so that I would have time to enjoy lounging in the comfortable robe, drinking the refreshing lemon water served in a wine glass while listening to the relaxing soundscapes in the waiting area. I was totally unaware that my outlook on myself and life would be changing in a matter of minutes.

“Patricia.” I heard a soft voice say. I looked up and saw a very attractive young woman in her early 20’s.

“I am Denise, I will be giving you your massage today.” We said our hellos and exchanged warm smiles.

I followed her to a room where she had me lay down on the table. It was then that I realized that she only had three fingers on her right hand. I know some people in that situation may have felt a bit uneasy but I had the exact opposite feeling. I was very comfortable. I wanted to know more about her. I do not know many individuals that would be able to overcome an obstacle like she had by doing what she was doing. Her job was working with her hands and one of which was badly disfigured.

As I closed my eyes to enjoy the serenity of the next fifty minutes I began to think about my own purpose in life. I had just celebrated my one year anniversary and expecting our first child. After getting married and relocating to a different state I was unsuccessful finding employment doing what I loved, which was working with students. Then once we discovered we were expecting our first child my husband and I decided that it would be great for me to be a stay at home mom.

I became so involved with my role of being a wife and impending motherhood that I was no longer doing things for me. I lost my passion for things I was once interested in and very good at might I say. By losing focus of my interests and neglecting to foster my talents I know longer had the confidence in myself that I once had. I have always enjoyed journaling and writing stories, but I no longer took the time to do so. When I would come across something inspiring that propelled the urge to write I would dismiss it because I no longer felt that I was good at it.

As those fifty minutes were slowly going by I was thinking of what Denise had inside her that motivated and inspired her spirit to choose a career that many would not think she would be able to do. What was her drive that allowed her to push past the naysayers and achieve her goal of being a masseuse? There was something that she had that I wanted. I wanted to believe in myself the way she believed in herself. Instead of being envious of this young woman I was inspired by her. Along with being a wife and a mother I wanted to do things that I enjoyed doing.

How dare I ever say that I am not good enough to accomplish a goal I wish to achieve! How dare YOU ever say that again about yourself! When you do think about Denise.

When I was pregnant with my daughter I went back to get a massage from that same spa and requested Denise. The woman told me that Denise was no longer there because she was given a greater opportunity somewhere else. I was happy for her while disappointed that I could not tell her how she inspired me. I will never forget those fifty minutes and how they changed my life forever.

What My Mom Loves Most About Me.

Yesterday was Mother’s Day. It was also exactly 2 months since my last post.  For the past 2 months I took a break from writing. It did not start out as a break but that is what it turned into. It was as if I was waiting for something big to happen before I could start writing again. At times I even found myself setting dates that I would write a post. I would say things to myself like “I will start writing when Lent is over.” or “I will write a post on the first of the month.” But I didn’t. Those days would just come and go and I would not write a thing.

Then yesterday happened. I was reading a magazine in the car while waiting for my husband to pick up some pizza.

Yes.   Pizza.   On.   Mother’s Day…….DON’T JUDGE ME…lol.

So I was reading the magazine when I came across an article titled 5 things you should know about  your mom (in case you were wondering, all the words were lowercase). These were the five things the article stated we should know about our mothers:

  1. What she loves most about you
  2. That her marriage isn’t perfect
  3. Her Achilles’ heel
  4. Her health history
  5. How other people see her

These were the things I knew:

  1. Being married myself I know that no marriage is perfect.
  2. My mother’s weakness is her grandchildren (in the sense of she would do anything for them, but she describes them as her strength).
  3. I constantly inquire (I am sure she would say I constantly over inquire) about her health.
  4. And, I know how other people see her. They see her has funny, open, and loving.

I knew all of these things about my mother. However, I did not know what she loves most about me. Please do not misunderstand, I know she loves things about me but I realized I did not know what she loves most. So, I called her and asked.

When she answered the phone I said, “Mom I am reading a magazine about 5 things you should know about your mom, but I do not know the first thing.” She asked what the question was and I asked, “What do you love most about me?” Without hesitation she answered, “Your creative writing skills.”

It doesn’t get any deeper than that for me. For all the many things she could have said (notice the word many…lol) what she loved most had to do with my writing.


Family Music Night

Here I was taking a break from the very thing that my own mother loves most about me.  It totally encouraged me to get back on here and write. Then in the mail today I received a copy of a magazine with a published piece I wrote and even received payment for. It is a small piece, but it is a published piece. It was such a confirmation.

I hope this post motivated and encouraged you to keep doing what you love doing, because it just might be what someone else loves most about you!


I’m Possible!

I have not posted in 13 days. I needed motivation and I came across this quote by Audrey Hepburn. “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says ‘I’m possible’!”

I loved it! Lately I have lost focus of my goals, my writing goals, my fitness and nutritional goals, and home organization goals. I find myself tired….often. Drained. From what? I don’t know. I do not get up super early and have even found myself taking a nap some days when the kids take theirs.

I have not been writing or working out so what am I tried from.To be honest with myself I must admit that I am tried because I have been doing nothing. I have not been doing the things that keep me focused, energized, and motivated.  The only thing being tired from doing nothing does is puts you in that funk. Are you in that funk I have spoken about before? Click here to read more about it.

Why have I stopped doing the things that I enjoy and make me feel good. Working out makes me feel great!  For me it is not about losing weight… it is about doing something I thought was impossible. Waking up early and working out is not something I thought I could do.  And if I did work out in the morning I figured it would make me feel drained all day. But I was able to do it and it had the exact opposite effect on me. It gave me more energy than usual.

There was a time when I made sure I drank at least 64oz of water every day. I did not think that was something I would be able to handle, but I did it. It made me feel so refreshed and focused. When I stopped drinking water throughout the day and began to feel irritable and dehydrated and I allowed myself to become content feeling that way.

When I started this blog I set the goal of 4 posts a week. They could be recipes, short posts, long posts, it didn’t matter as long as there were 4 a week. At first I was making my goal and it was not a difficult task. It was fun.  I enjoyed going to the stats and seeing how many people my blog reached… people from all over the world were reading my posts. I was so excited! So why did I stop?

I begin to ask myself the following questions:

  • Why did I start doing nothing?
  • Why am I sabotaging my own progress?
  • Am I am afraid of success?

Ask yourself these questions when you feel yourself retreating from the things you enjoy that make you feel better about yourself. The answers you come up with will be a a wake up call. If you begin to feel your goals are impossible turn that ugly word into “I’m possible”. And never forget that with God ALL things are possible.

Taking the time to do things for me makes me a better, wife, mother, daughter, and child of God.  I need to stop being tried from doing nothing and start being energized doing something!


Writer’s Block

Being a writer, nothing is worse than not having anything to say. I have ideas for some posts but something is hindering me from competing them.  I have about 3 drafts that I can not seem to finish. I am at a standstill.  So I decided to write about not being able to write. Why is it that I am unable to complete these posts? What is blocking me? Is it lack of confidence or insecurities when it comes to my writing?

This not only happens to writers. It can happen to anybody. Are you trying to get in shape? Do you ever get to a point where you hit a standstill and your progress stops? What should you do? Just stop? No! Take a step back and try to be more creative. Face your issue head on and do new things to continue your progress.

Have confidence and faith in yourself and in your abilities. If you give up on a goal no one is going to complete it for you. Find ways to motivate and inspire yourself. Here are some some things you can do.

  • Talk to a encouraging friend
  • Journal about it.
  • Get creative
  • Take a short break to make a new plan
  • Get organized

What ever you do just DON’T stop! If you stop NOTHING can be accomplished. I could have just not put up a post and kept looking at my uncompleted drafts but I didn’t. I got creative and decided to face my issue by writing about it. I don’t always have to have a clever topic or something deep to say. I simply enjoy writing and should just write.






You Can Do It!

When I was pregnant with my first child my husband booked me a pregnancy massage. I arrived at the Spa early to relax in the waiting area. There I was met with beautiful soundscapes, crisp cool water with lemon, and a variety magazines filed with celebrity gossip. I heard the door open and a gentle voice call my name. I looked up to find an attractive young girl with a warm smile.

She introduced herself and we shook hands. It was then I noticed that she only had 3 fingers on her right hand.  Another might have felt slightly uneasy but I didn’t, I felt very comfortable with her. She inspired me. Although she had a handicap she entered into a profession that made her look it in the face and move past it. A profession that called for her to use her hands. I am sure she faced many naysayers along her journey, but she believed in herself. So in the room w
as one person afraid of pursuing dreams for fear of failure or perhaps success (click here) and another person who knew her capabilities are limitless.

Do you ever feel like you can’t do it? Well you can. And you can do it well. That massage I had was the best one I had ever received. When I was pregnant with my second child I went back to the Spa and asked for her. To my disappointment the receptionist said that she no longer worked there, she had taken a position somewhere else. I was disappointed because I hoped to be in her presence again, I wanted her inspiration to increase my motivation. I am sure she is accomplishing great things.icandoallthings

Believe in yourself. How can you expect someone else to believe in you if you don’t even believe in you?


In a Funk

A few weeks ago I told my husband that I was depressed. The children were sleep and I just broke down in the living room. He looked at me with a quizzical look and again I said “I’m depressed”. I had entered into a funk that I had never experienced before. I was tired constantly, gaining weight, unmotivated, and short tempered. And you know what? My husband hadn’t noticed. That must have meant that I was not the happy, nurturing, easy going, energetic person that I thought I was. If I was that person then my husband would have seen the changes in me. His reaction made me do some self reflection.

If you were in a funk would those closest to you notice? At some point I traded my smile for a scowl. Sweats replaced nice outfits. And moodiness moved in and kicked my nurturing spirit out. I felt broken. A major part of the problem was not taking time for what is most important to me. Which is my relationship with God. I was no longer spending time on devotions and nurturing my relationship with Christ. My faith has ALWAYS been something that was very important to me.  My husband and I would pray together every morning and I was in church every Sunday, but that is where it ended. I no longer spent one on one time with God. I would get wrapped up in all of my responsibilities of the day and lost sight of the relationship in my life that mattered most.

For those of you who have a relationship with Christ you know what I mean. For those of you who don’t have a relationship with Christ you should try Him for yourself. You won’t be disappointed.  As I said earlier, I felt broken. I am feeling much better now and I am putting the pieces back together. However, I don’t want to put the pieces back the same way they were before. I want to put them back differently and make a new picture. One more beautiful and unique than before.

I have been blessed beyond measure, and I was confused why I felt this way. My husband and children are amazing and my extended family is awesome. We all have a purpose in life and we need to take the time to investigate what it is. Recognizing your blessings is a major step in feeling good about who you are. Know that you are amazing and your achievements are limitless. Laugh often, cry sometimes, and be inspired always.

Next time (if there is a next time) where I find myself in a funk, my husband will notice.


Food Journal / Church Weight Loss Challenge

wpid-20140103_120750.jpgThe other day I decided to start a food journal. It was 7pm and I looked in the mirror fed up with the weight I have gained. I can not even blame it on having two children because I lost the weight shortly after my daughter (who is 1) was born. In fact, since having my gallbladder surgery in June I have gained 11 pounds.

wpid-PhotoGrid_1388775757152.jpgThree months ago the Pastor of my church (who is also my father-in-love) decided to start a 3 month church-wide weight loss challenge. Do not get it confused with a competition to see who loses the most weight. He wants us to simply challenge ourselves to be healthier as a congregation. He even donated gym equipment to the church that he purchased himself so that there would be a place for members to go and work out.

With 2 small children and my church being  about 40 minutes away it is hard for me to get over there through the week with all of our daily activities.  However, we have an elliptical at home so I promised myself that I would use that and do some form of exercise daily.

And I did. I would get up every morning at 6:30 and work out. At times I would even switch it up by doing workouts that were OnDemand.  I felt good. But then. That one morning. It only takes ONE morning to lay in bed a little longer and not get up to work out. That led to TWO days and so forth. I started to feel blah again. So the other day the idea of a food journal hit me.

It was 7pm and I decided to write down everything I had eaten and drank up until that point that day. It was a slap in the face. Physically writing down that I was  eating like crap and had gone through the day only having drank 1/2 of a pineapple soda and a cup of iced tea for my fluids is such an eye opener. Each day as I right down what I have eaten I vow that I will not feel as bad as I did the day before because each day I find myself doing better.  I still need to up my water intake but I am making progress.

Next week the commitment is over. I know I did not make the progress I had hoped but you know what? I have started a new 3 months and I will keep it going.

I will do a separate post to go in detail about feeling blah and my weight loss journey.