Marital Monday: Take Notes

I enjoy observing older couples or couples married for years. I have been married for 5 years so I feel there is always something to learn about marriage. The following two situations are ones that I have recently observed and took mental notes on.

Situation 1:

A few years ago my cousin got married in Florida. My husband and I flew down to attend and my mother flew down as well. It is very rare for my parents not to travel together. Usually when you see one, you see the other. They have been married for 42 years now and that is just the way it has always been.

My mother stayed with us for the two nights. At one point while we were sitting watching TV on the first night she got up and said she was going to get an orange. She got her orange, peeled it and then offered half to my husband and I. Both of us declined and she just stood there for a minute then she sighed and said,

“I miss your father, he always eats the other half of the orange.”

I was very moved by this so I took a mental note. I noted her sincerity, her love, and her appreciation for her husband in his absence. You could really see that she missed him. That is the kind of love I am looking to have as my marriage grows. I thought it was sweet.

I look forward to sharing fruit with my husband, I just have to figure out which one because he is not a fan of oranges.

Situation 2:

The other week while I was waiting for my car to get an oil change there was another woman waiting also. She was an older woman just sitting doing a crossword puzzle. Then her phone rang and this is the gist of the conversation I heard.

“Hey Baby…..just waiting for the car to get done…..I am going to make some matzo balls and chicken for you and leave it on the counter…..I love too….bye honey.”

After she hung up I told her that sounded good (I have a thing for matzo balls, in case you didn’t pick up on that in Check Please). She smiled and told me that she didn’t like it but her husband loves when she makes that dish. I don’t know if I felt inspired or encouraged, but it was something. You can tell they have been married for a while so I decided to take a mental note. I noted her confidence, her usage of endearing terms and her voice level while speaking to her husband. It was obvious that the spark is still there between them just by overhearing her verbal communication.

So next time you see a more seasoned couple take mental notes keeping in mind that no marriage is perfect and what works for one couple may not work for another. Just use what you observe as a guide. Years from now you never now what young couple might be observing your marriage and taking mental notes.


What My Mom Loves Most About Me.

Yesterday was Mother’s Day. It was also exactly 2 months since my last post.  For the past 2 months I took a break from writing. It did not start out as a break but that is what it turned into. It was as if I was waiting for something big to happen before I could start writing again. At times I even found myself setting dates that I would write a post. I would say things to myself like “I will start writing when Lent is over.” or “I will write a post on the first of the month.” But I didn’t. Those days would just come and go and I would not write a thing.

Then yesterday happened. I was reading a magazine in the car while waiting for my husband to pick up some pizza.

Yes.   Pizza.   On.   Mother’s Day…….DON’T JUDGE ME…lol.

So I was reading the magazine when I came across an article titled 5 things you should know about  your mom (in case you were wondering, all the words were lowercase). These were the five things the article stated we should know about our mothers:

  1. What she loves most about you
  2. That her marriage isn’t perfect
  3. Her Achilles’ heel
  4. Her health history
  5. How other people see her

These were the things I knew:

  1. Being married myself I know that no marriage is perfect.
  2. My mother’s weakness is her grandchildren (in the sense of she would do anything for them, but she describes them as her strength).
  3. I constantly inquire (I am sure she would say I constantly over inquire) about her health.
  4. And, I know how other people see her. They see her has funny, open, and loving.

I knew all of these things about my mother. However, I did not know what she loves most about me. Please do not misunderstand, I know she loves things about me but I realized I did not know what she loves most. So, I called her and asked.

When she answered the phone I said, “Mom I am reading a magazine about 5 things you should know about your mom, but I do not know the first thing.” She asked what the question was and I asked, “What do you love most about me?” Without hesitation she answered, “Your creative writing skills.”

It doesn’t get any deeper than that for me. For all the many things she could have said (notice the word many…lol) what she loved most had to do with my writing.


Family Music Night

Here I was taking a break from the very thing that my own mother loves most about me.  It totally encouraged me to get back on here and write. Then in the mail today I received a copy of a magazine with a published piece I wrote and even received payment for. It is a small piece, but it is a published piece. It was such a confirmation.

I hope this post motivated and encouraged you to keep doing what you love doing, because it just might be what someone else loves most about you!


Writer’s Block

Being a writer, nothing is worse than not having anything to say. I have ideas for some posts but something is hindering me from competing them.  I have about 3 drafts that I can not seem to finish. I am at a standstill.  So I decided to write about not being able to write. Why is it that I am unable to complete these posts? What is blocking me? Is it lack of confidence or insecurities when it comes to my writing?

This not only happens to writers. It can happen to anybody. Are you trying to get in shape? Do you ever get to a point where you hit a standstill and your progress stops? What should you do? Just stop? No! Take a step back and try to be more creative. Face your issue head on and do new things to continue your progress.

Have confidence and faith in yourself and in your abilities. If you give up on a goal no one is going to complete it for you. Find ways to motivate and inspire yourself. Here are some some things you can do.

  • Talk to a encouraging friend
  • Journal about it.
  • Get creative
  • Take a short break to make a new plan
  • Get organized

What ever you do just DON’T stop! If you stop NOTHING can be accomplished. I could have just not put up a post and kept looking at my uncompleted drafts but I didn’t. I got creative and decided to face my issue by writing about it. I don’t always have to have a clever topic or something deep to say. I simply enjoy writing and should just write.